Taking on my fear of…networking

I’ve always found networking events to be scary. What I would normally do was just stick to people whom I have been acquainted with or find other lone rangers (possible fellow introverts and find comfort in each others’ company).

When I force myself to reflect on the reasons for my fear, I find insecurity and low self-confidence. What I need to put on the “list of things to research on” is how to make a positive first impression. I’ve once heard someone saying that “we should not worry too much about making an impression (as long as we carry ourselves well) because most of the time people are too self-absorbed to notice”. It can a relief to shy people out there BUT then again you wouldn’t want to waste time on people who only care about themselves.

Before I started graduate school, I made it one of my goals to broaden my social circle and meet new people, ie. network. I have to admit my main purpose is to increase my chances of landing a job after graduation. Since I am also new to Melbourne, I need to start building a new social network from scratch.

Orientation week has not been too successful but as classes start up, I’ve been finding courage to talk to my classmates (which might sound like a perfectly normal, non-intimidating thing to do but to me it’s a huge step because it has always been other people who made the first step to get to know me).

Some of the pro-active actions I did today were:-

1. Introducing myself to fellow classmates over coffee and remembering their names(!);
2. Emailed my mentor to meet up for coffee; and
3. Emailed a former colleague (same organisation, different country & continent) whom I’ve chat over SameTime to meet up for coffee.

What I keep reminding myself time and time again is that even if I have to leave Melbourne by the end of this adventure, I can always bring the skills I have acquired wherever I go. So all this effort will not never be in vain.

White Night Melbourne

The first White Night Melbourne was held on 23 February 2013. I went with my fiance and we reached the city at about 9pm. We didn’t have the program book because we weren’t in the city when the organiser was distributing the program book. According to one of the event volunteers, ALL of the booklets were distributed to commuters coming and going out of the CBD earlier in the evening and there were none left for those during the actual event – poor planning on the organiser’s part.

Overall it was an interesting experience – the clever lighting really transformed Melbourne that I know and the event turnout was crazy. There was a sea of people everywhere, especially around Flinders Street and Swanston Street area circa 9pm to 1am. I overheard someone saying at that the only other time the city was packed with people was during new year’s eve.

It was too bad we our feet couldn’t take us to all the attractions – mostly because we didn’t have the program booklet. On hindsight, we should have plan our route for the night (using the online guide on the official website) instead of just wondering around aimlessly.

Looking forward to more events in Melbourne, next up is Moomba Festival.

I pulled a Felicity

In case you didn’t know about Felicity :

Felicity is an American primetime televisiondrama series that was produced by Touchstone Television and Imagine Television for the WB Television Network. The series revolves around the fictional college experiences of the title character, Felicity Porter, portrayed by Keri Russell, as she attends the “University of New York,” based on New York University, across the country from her home in Palo Alto, California. – Wikipedia

The reason for her to make the move was -

The story of the series begins at Felicity’s high school graduation where she asks Ben Covington, a classmate whom she has a crush on, to sign her yearbook. Moved by his comment that he wished he had gotten to know her, she changes her education plans completely, deciding to follow Ben to New York rather than attend Stanford University for pre-med. Felicity’s overbearing parents, concerned about Felicity’s seemingly rash decision, come to New York to try to convince her to return home and “get back on track.” Felicity has second thoughts about her decision, but soon realizes that she came, not only to follow Ben, but to discover her true inner self.

So here’s my version of the story -

It revolves around real life post-graduate experiences of the title character, silentsiren, portrayed by herself, as she attends the University of Melbourne, across the continent from her home in Malaysia. 

The story begins a month before silentsiren’s return to Malaysia following the end of her exchange program where her then-boyfriend asked her to start a long-distance relationship with him. Moved by his sincerity to make the relationship work, she starts making plans to come back to Melbourne. However, her plan to further her education right after graduation did not materialise. Two years after joining the rat race and months after her engagement to the aforementioned boyfriend, silentsiren finally returned to Melbourne. silentsiren has second thoughts about her decision, but soon realises that she came, not only to follow her fiance, but to discover her true inner self.

Funny thing is my real name is Felicity.

I am here. Now.

“Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.”

I haven’t written anything in a while. I will, soon! Just that I’ve been enjoying the little holiday from work by turning into a GIANT sloth. I eat, surf the net, watch TV series, and sleep. Day in, day out.

Actually I have so many things which I need want need to write about. It’s all in my head, but the ideas are all muddled together now. It’s a mess in there. I need to dump everything here so I can start thinking clearly again. Being the introvert that I am, I’ve always find that writing down my thoughts helps me to gain better understanding of my current situation and myself. So which is why I need to stop being a sloth for at least three hours and write something.

After dinner though. Another thing about me: I can’t think clearly when I’m unfed.

Lost and Found.

I just moved to my new place. There this smell in this place that reminds me of my old house in Dandenong Road. I don’t know what is the source of it, maybe it’s the smell of foodstuff in the kitchen or the wooden cabinets. I remember I was depressed in the first few weeks I was in that house. I hated the weather, I missed my life and the people I know in Sunway.

And that’s exactly how I feel now, too. I hate the weather in KL, I can hardly see the blue sky here. The sky is perpetually being blocked by smog from the city. I miss Sunway. I miss the familiarity. Three years worth of memories. This is despite the fact that the faces I once knew are no longer around, being replaced by new faces with naivety in their eyes.

In the foresight, I have a feeling that that things will turn out to be a lot similar to those few months in Dandenong Rd. Just because I am currently facing the same issues: new environment, new friends AND long distance relationship. It’s going to be tough to adjust but I need to persevere because once I “get the hang” of things, it WILL be easier. One important lesson which I learnt in those few months: I need to find contentment in people/things that I have around me rather than pining for those who/which are missing.

Road Not Taken

I dream of going to faraway places, to see the sights, to hear the sounds, and explore. . . but I have to put this dream on hold for now. What could I have done years ago that would change my fate today. Maybe if I was in a different industry. Maybe, maybe.

Do you want to know why I wanted to join this industry? I thought I could be one of the jet-setting career women. To be able to travel to major financial capitals for business, meet highly successful corporate people and have so much disposable income to travel around the world. At the end of the day, I want to be financially independent so I don’t have to ever actively work for money. Let the money work for me. Ambitious much?

Disillusionment sets in. I am now 21. How long would it take me to reach that point? I don’t like my job. How much of my soul do I need to sell in order to get to that point? Now, what did my parents teach me about instant gratification?

I had a long talk with the Boyfriend and he advised me to take up the job offer at the Company. I see his point, it’s very sensible to grab a job offer while it stands, a very good job offer at that.

My heart tells me to go on and follow my dreams because we only live once… but my mind tells me to stay because a missed opportunity to start my career now may prove to be costly in the future.

Which one would I regret more? I wish we could live more than once because I can’t sleep well at night thinking about the other option. Always wondering “What if”. . .

Last Day of Work

My official last day of internship: 28th February 2011

All I do at the office nowadays is post some mails out, help out my senior with “company search” (find out what’s the company’s principal activity and their web address) and filing. My work day is just so mind-numbingly boring that I always nod off at work. I can’t be bothered with the internship anymore. I’ve written and submitted my report, got job evaluation from my director and now I just want to go on a holiday. An extended one. But that’s another story.

So the Boyfriend has been bugging asking me to take picture of the office for a while now and I finally got around to it yesterday. Almost everyone was out for lunch so I took my phone out and started snapping. I was feeling shy because because one of my senior was around. I always get the feeling that she sees me as this silly, annoying little girl. . . Anyways, so I tried to discreetly take some photos of the office. Here they are:

The Senior

***

Bettter behave or else you get sent to the File Room

***

The Receptionist reading some papers

***

The Office

***

My crappy PC

***

My work station

***

The view from 14th Floor

***

My UNofficial last day of internship: 24th February 2011

I can’t wait to lounge around all day in my pajama. Bliss~